Single and Seeking? Some Words of Advice..
It’s all so amazing at the beginning of a relationship. The connection is strong, and the attraction is off the charts. You finish each other’s sentences; you don’t sleep much; you have a wonderful time just going to the grocery store together. This must be the one you’ve been waiting for – grass is greener, food tastes better, the world is more beautiful. It’s magical.
Most relationships begin this way. It’s the Romantic Love stage; it allows couples to connect and bond. Many think that the relationship will feel like this forever, and that the object of their affection will always be this way.
And then it changes, leaving people wondering what happened.
It’s supposed to change; relationships need to grow and deepen. The romantic “high” we all feel is just one slice of the relationship pie. There are other areas that need to grow, such as shared interests, lifestyles, friendship, and spirituality. Other aspects need to be explored: common core values, communication, conflict resolution, and each person’s relationship needs and requirements. This is the time to effectively evaluate the alignment of the relationship. Some couples realize that they don’t align well enough to stay together, while others do and so they choose long-term partnership.
Here are some words of advice to support your process:
- Stop chasing down that initial connection: Allow some time for the relationship to evolve and then see what kind of connection there is.
- Evaluate consciously: Know your core values, needs, and requirements. Look beyond the romance to see if this is the right fit for you.
- Stand your ground: Honor your needs and requirements. Don’t let the “but we were so connected” feeling cloud your judgment. Be true to you!
These words will help you look beyond the Romantic Love stage, and effectively decide if the relationship is right for you. Connection is essential, but it takes more than that to build a life together.